Sign of the Apocalypse #10 - this Kazaky video is an ACTUAL THING

Pray.

Okay so a bunch of guys with sick bodies and lisps decided to become a boyband in the Ukraine and release a song whose lyrics consist of about 3 words all relating to SEX or FASHION or FASHIONABLE SEX. 

The result is a hyper-gay version of Beyonce's 'Single Ladies' clip but with an absolutely shit song playing over it, and, presumably, some VERY DISAPPOINTED FATHERS. To be fair, the guys are probably not too unattractive underneath all that makeup, and the song would be a decent dance tune without the stream-of-consciousness style horniness the boys keep spewing over the beats for no reason.  But at the end of the day the whole thing is a bit horrifying in an 'A-List does music' kind of way, and also AMAZING in that same exact fashion.

In the interest of journalistic integrity, we did some research by Googling "KASAKY WIKIPEDIA" and found that the band consist of "Artur Archibaz (Артур Арчибаз), Kyryll Fedorenko (Кирилл Федоренко), Stas Pavlov (Стас Павлов) and Oleh Zhezhel (Олег Жежель), who also choreographed the video."

So...there's that then.

Sign of the Apocalypse #11 - The UK's Eurovision entry is EVEN WORSE when actually recorded

Weep for pop, dear friends.  For this...THIS...will be the shining example of pop genius that the beacon of the English speaking world will foist upon millions of unsuspecting Eurotrash come May 29th.  Witness, if you dare, the full-on studio recording of 'That Sounds Good To Me,' the Stock/Waterman-penned crime against humanity, sung by a young man who has unwittingly become the ACTUAL ANTICHRIST, leading the demonic charge across the pop skies. 

Josh Dubovie, the singer, is from Essex - the British New Jersey - and despite being rather easy on the eye doesn't exactly fill the stage with his Gaga-like presence.  Still, millions (read: a few hundred of his mother's friends) voted him as the VOICE OF A NATION on the UK Eurovision "talent" competition, so he inexplicably will be going on to represent the country in Oslo this year. 





"Null points."

Sign of the Apocalpyse #9: This is the UK's Eurovision entry this year

It's that time of year again.  When the Page 3 models, "not gay" West End stars, and all the girls that have been chucked out of Sugababes come out of the woodwork to vie for the chance to represent the glorious United Kingdom at the Eurovision Song Contest.  With all that raw, stunning talent (this process gave us Scooch, remember) we are sure to have a winner on our hands, as some guy named Josh walked away with the "honor."  He will be singing a thing by Mike Stock and Pete Waterman (2 of the 3 guys in Stock, Aitken, Waterman - the team that gave us masterpieces by Bananarama and Kylie, and frankly, gentlemen, we expected a bit better) and is certain to get....about 5 points total. 



The final is on May 29.